Truth and drugs (and snow)

I woke up this morning to find a blanket of white covering my world. I live in the east of England and snow happens here about 2 days of the year so this is a very cool (excuse the pun) event. Having had a few too many drinks last night I have so far not ventured out into the wintery wonderland that is outside. In fact given the heating in my house is not working particularly well so I think that I might just stay in bed.

I have started on a course of supressive therapy. My last outbreak was one of the worst I have had - not very painful or itchy but it took a while to clear up. It has for now retreated and I have been prescribed acyclovir twice a day for the forseeable future. I think that having an outbreak is one of the hardest things about herpes - it is a constant reminder . I hope the supressive drugs stop me from having such regular outbreaks and that I might be able to reclaim a normal sex life (actually I want a fun sex life - I am not sure this means a 'normal' one but I think you know what I mean).

Talking about sex life I am sure you are itching (oh dear, another pun!) to know what happened with the 'new girl' that I was spoke about in my last post. Well, I told her! This was about 2 weeks ago - I found myself walking to her house and I had already decided that I had to do it. I was nervous but not as nervous as I had expected to be. I walked into her room and sat down and we spoke first about everyday things. I realised that the time had come and I just had to be a man and so I spoke.

I told her that I had something to tell her and she sat down and looked at me with her beautiful green eyes. I looked staight back at her and for a minute I couldn't speak. I took a deep breath and then the words came. I started by asking her if she knew what cold sores are and then I explained that I get cold sores, just somewhere else. I talked about what a common sti herpes is and I explained that with supressive medication, condoms and abstinence during and immediately after an outbreak the chance of transmission is incredibly small (this is difficult to quantify and I will talk about it another time). After about 10 minutes I realised that I probably should have prepared slides (joking!) and so I stopped.

She looked at me and then she kissed me.

A great new girl and a not so great new outbreak

Mood: very happy, slightly scared, a bit itchy (okay itchy is not really a mood but you get the idea)

I went for a date with a girl last tuesday and so it turns out she is fantastic. Barely more than a day has passed since then without seeing her. Just her presence seems to twist time around so that it always seems to suddenly be very late and I never achieve much more than to get lost staring into her beautiful green eyes. What is even better is that she seems to feel the same way about me. It all sounds great no? The hard bit is that I know that I have to tell her about my itchy friend and frankly, as you might expect, I am just a little bit scared. I know all the 'if she is the right one then she will accept it' stuff but I guess I may be about to find out just what it means to be a man with herpes.

I have had a lot I wanted to say in the last couple of weeks but I have not known how to say it - and so I have not posted. I am having another outbreak at the moment - I was feeling it a bit at the start of the weekend but it has developed in the last day. I am feeling a bit down about this because I seem to have had outbreaks at least every 2 or 3 months in the last year. I am going to see the doctor tomorrow to see if it might be worth trying some supressive therapy. Fortunately my symptoms have never been really bad but I find it hard to deal with on such a regular basis. This seems even harder now that I would just like to relax and spend more time with this amazing girl.